“The more you love, the more you lose. The more you lose, the more you learn. The more you learn, the more you love. You can’t. “~ Kate McGarhan
I remember reading somewhere that we were all on this planet to learn the lessons.
It was made for us, only for us. Like a special recipe made of stars and embedded in our small developing foetation.
It may sound a little “woooo”, but it was very comfortable to read.
For much of my life, I compared my life to others. I see people who seem to have it all together and wonder if they have ever had a hard time. I was envious because they seemed to have sailed a lifetime.
“”Why do I have to deal with this instead of them? What did you make a mistake? “
But maybe they aren’t here to learn my lesson. They are here to learn them, whatever it is.
My life was full of typical ups and downs, but when my sister died in 2013, it became overwhelmingly low.
The pain of her loss was so intense that I wanted to pull myself out of my body. I really believed that I was the only one who experienced this intolerable pain.
I was so incredibly lonely when I went to a party and saw people laughing and having a great time. It was as if I had been banished to another dark and miserable planet, but everyone else was living a cheerful life. I was angry that others weren’t suffering like me. I kept asking myself over and over again, “Why me? Why my Sister? “
I was so absorbed in my anguish that I couldn’t realize that others were also experiencing it.
Seven years have passed since my sister died, and now I understand that my sadness is concrete and special, but not unique. Sadness is another emotion that we humans experience during our journey of life. I don’t think anyone else has experienced it, as it’s just one of the emotions that doesn’t have as much airtime as joy.
In the process, I met other people who told me about trauma and pain that I had completely escaped. Things may have been different, but it reminded me that it didn’t necessarily mean they were better.
This journey of learning that sadness is shared by many others has made me deeply humble. We are all experiencing tragedy and broken hearts. No matter how happy and cheerful it may seem at first, no one in the world suffers from any pain.
When we think we are alone in suffering, we are not doing it well for everyone, not to mention ourselves. Focusing on ourselves and our pain is like a whirlpool that only isolates us and makes us feel sick.
It is important to get out of yourself in an era of great suffering. Often, the best remedy is to volunteer to help someone who is less fortunate than you. It suddenly becomes clear that you are not the only one struggling.
It’s easy to forget this, especially since we live in the world of social media. No matter where you look, Instagram stories are born. Everyone seems to be having the best time ever. At least that’s what they want you to think about. But how much do you really know about these people you follow?
Everyone you meet, online or directly, has a completely different side that you may never actually see.
So the next time you look at others or scan social media and wonder why your life doesn’t go as smoothly as yours, you want something about your life. Remember that there are people. It’s like that quote, “Every time you point your finger, three people point to you.” It can also be applied in this situation.
And don’t forget that everyone is fighting a battle you know nothing about.
Someone may have a lifelong struggle with an eating disorder and may be envious of a particular model or celebrity having a perfect body, but he is aware that this particular model is dealing with severe PTSD. not.
The list of struggles we may face is as endless as the people on this planet. You simply never know what someone is experiencing. But you can be sure that everyone has their own path, their own challenges, and their own lessons to learn.
I wish someone had told me this earlier, but maybe I didn’t hear it. Maybe this was one of the many lessons I needed to learn. No one is good or bad. They are just different.