The word “surreal” comes to mind. Life has long felt like an alternative universe, and it feels even stranger during the holiday season.
After many sacrifices of the year, reality has abandoned the traditions we cherish and demanded that we stay away from those who may already feel too long to see. I will.
And many are navigating the season with a sense of sadness — for lost loved ones, lost purposes, and perhaps lost hope.
Maybe it’s not you. Maybe you are full of gratitude for everything you have, and now even more thankful for the pandemic.
One day, that’s me too.
One day I look around and feel undoubtedly fortunate to meet my health, my family, and all my needs.
On other days, I feel the weight of these long and isolated moons and mourn the lost time with my loved ones and the family celebrations from me with my parents and siblings who live together nationwide.
You may be in a similar position and vibrating like a pendulum between gratitude and sadness. And you may be discussing how to approach logistically, mentally, and emotionally this season.
Whatever your unique situation, we hope that this checklist will help you safely approach the weeks ahead with peace, hope, and joy wherever you can create it.
This is big and the most difficult to swallow and follow. This year is a year of trials and is characterized by loss and heartache for many. We’re sick of everything and want this pandemic to be behind us, but not yet. As much as we want to pay attention to the wind and end the year of celebrating with all our loved ones, we all need to play our part in protecting ourselves and those around us.
It’s not the most exciting way to get started with this list, but I thought it would get out of the way!
If you haven’t seen the CDC guidelines for holiday gatherings yet, you can find them here.
As you may have experienced, people have very different ways of thinking about what constitutes “attention”, and some people try to take risks.
For example, my extended family met with at least four different households at Thanksgiving. This includes households that are regularly exposed to large numbers of people and households that do not wear masks. They will do so again at Christmas. It’s a risk I’m not willing to take, but I’m also 3,000 miles away, so it’s a choice I don’t have to make.
If you’re thinking of getting together with your family, make it clear where everyone is standing, what they are paying attention to in their daily lives, and what they are paying attention to that day. Is indispensable. It’s very likely that you’re wrong, so don’t assume that you know what someone thinks unless you’ve explicitly stated it.
This can be difficult. You may be hurt, frustrated, or resentful when people make choices that may seem reckless to you or impose beliefs that you disagree with. Separating people from their choices is difficult, especially if they include emotionally stressful things like pandemic safety, and if their choices seem selfish to you, do it. It is difficult not to receive it personally.
I came here recently, and I took it very personally. I was upset, criticized, and judged. What I didn’t do was change someone’s opinion or somehow improve the situation. At that time, I realized that I needed to empathize with people who had a different perspective than I did. Instead of making the same choices, I had to understand and focus on the feelings behind them.
This does not mean that we need to tolerate decisions we disagree with, or endanger ourselves in some way. That means we accept what we can’t control and choose love over righteousness, but we guarantee that it may feel.
The odds have never been easier for you. Even if you’re healthy, have a job and an overhead roof, and haven’t lost a loved one, this year has probably hit your mental health. I know it was my sacrifice.
You may now feel lonely, discouraged, overwhelmed, impatient, or totally depressed. You may also be frustrated with having to change your usual vacation plans when you can actually use a little extra love, joy, and connections.
It’s okay if you feel frustrated.It’s okay to feel anything Even if you know you are lucky, you feel. Especially during the holidays, it’s hard to stay far from the people we love, and we never miss the traditions we value most. Be very kind to yourself and know that gratitude can be mixed with a variety of complex emotions.
I know how fascinating it is to live every day in resistance, especially when you lose a lot, or when things look unfair.I know how easy it is to get things involvedshould There was Assumption Or become right If there is …
What I don’t know is what you specifically experienced or what you are feeling right now.So know I’m not suggesting it’s easy to accept I If I were in your position, it would be easy to do.
I can only talk about the general idea of acceptance and how it releases us mentally when we stop fighting reality.We know that when we accept something we can’t control, we are free to focus on us it can Control them and get the most out of them.
I also know that coming from an accepted place can make you feel better about who you are and, ultimately, about life, even if it takes time to get there. I’m lighter, more present, more accessible to those around me, and more likely to see opportunities that were previously seen as unfair.
Like everything in life, this is all temporary. Things don’t always look like this. These challenges, these emotions, they don’t last forever. We will eventually overcome this and be able to live more freely. Life is not exactly the same for many, but as life evolves and adapts, we will find new normal and new reasons to smile.
It may be confusing now. The quakes of this experience may seem to send shock waves for years, and we will never find our foothold. But we are surprisingly resilient as human beings. Maybe you have experienced some deeply tested experiences in your life, and you have become stronger, smarter, and maybe richer by experiencing what you have experienced.
Believe that you not only get over this, but also have more reasons to smile and have more holidays to celebrate with your loved ones. This year will one day be crazy with all the rearview mirrors as long as we continue to drive carefully on this rather dangerous road in front of us.
One of the gifts of any challenge is that we need to be a little more creative. It can itself be a source of pride and joy. If you’ve had a full meal on the day you really need to go shopping for groceries, you know what I mean! My mom has a special phrase about this: “It’s not bad to throw together!”
Think of this as your Throw Together — It’s your chance to do more with less effort, find simplicity and beauty, get the most out of what you have, and perhaps start a new tradition.
I think you have mastered the technology of online connection this year. Now let’s move on to the next level. How can I celebrate with people from afar in a creative way? And how can you honor the people in front of you, even if they are only a small part of the one you love?
I will focus on my son’s second Christmas excitement. I think my son will be more happy this year.I’d like a zoom watch for my brother Very brady Christmas With me, because we are stupid and see it every year. And on Christmas morning, when my family opens the gift I sent, I open the portal with my family, so it feels like I’m there.
So I’m here. At the end of a strange and painful year, we look at more than a few months of uncertainty and potential stress and struggle. Looking back, no one blames us. It’s like a pile of huge multicars behind us. It’s hard not to get jerky. And no one will be surprised to look ahead and worry about the possibility of more accidents in the future.
But nowadays, many of us sit safely in the car, have a fever and music, and at least one loves playing car games and spending time.
I understand that this is not the case for everyone. You may not meet your needs correctly, and you may feel dangerous in your home. If it’s you, know that there are resources there to support you. You can find some here and here.
Choose if it’s not you, that is, if you’re relatively lucky and you choose to attend, like me, thank you and have a lot of fun. I will do my best.
If that is difficult, do something good for yourself. Then try again. Even if it doesn’t look a little hard, take a look at the beauty in front of you. Even if you want to show off the lyrics with someone far away, listen to the magic of the music being played. Take a deep breath, take an inventory of all that is working, and enjoy being here now.
I think one of the gifts, especially during trials, is to always remind you of the truth, but we often forget: life is short, nothing is guaranteed, everything with loved ones. The moments are precious and are what we ultimately make with it every day.
Life is different for all of us, so I know it’s easier to get the most out of the life they live in than others. But when I recall these things, I also know that I feel more present, peaceful and alive. And that’s the best way to evaluate the life we’re currently living in — choosing to live it perfectly.
To help all of us be a little more attentive, I’m currently running a holiday sale of the newly launched Mindfulness Kit. It includes 4 aromatherapy-based products for peace and relaxation and 3 free bonus guides for daily calm.
For a limited time, it’s available for $ 29 (usually $ 45). I know that many of you already have kits for yourself and for holiday gifts to friends and family. If you haven’t done so already, it might be the best time to give it a try or give it to someone who is relaxed and reassured. I hope it brings a little tranquility to you and the people you love!